Homemaker.
This is the divisive part of Harrison Butker's commencement speech at Benedictine College. This is the hot take.
First, if you are upset, I want you to listen to the speech. The whole thing. Not just part of it. Not just a headline, or a snippet. The whole speech.
Because I heard Harrison Butker say that many women will go on to have great careers, AND many of them are likely excited about being a wife and mother. Both. Both can be true. He said that.
The man then wept on stage talking about how well his wife cares for him and their children. He cherished her contributions to their family.
Because being a mom and wife IS the most important part of my life.
In a society that has seen multiple NFL players arrested for domestic abuse, it's absolutely bonkers to me that we're vilifying the man who stood up and said something like, "honor your spouse's unique qualities as a homemaker."
Harrison Butker is a Catholic man. Speaking at a Catholic university. To Catholic students. Espousing Catholic ideas that women are central to the home.
He didn't say women can't or shouldn't work. He didn't say women are lesser or "belong in the kitchen."
He said women are special and unique.
The homemakers.
And I loved it.
I am old school and always will be, like my grandfather and his grandfather before him.
Are women inferior ? NO
My wife is my equal, my partner, the love of my life. I put her above ANY other family or friends.
I believe in a traditional marriage, if I could afford for her to stay home and that is in fact WHAT SHE WANTED, that’s exactly where she would be and I would be the bread winner.
There have been times where because of bodily injury to me, or losing a job I have gone months or even years without working where she was the bread winner. But in those times I worked doubly hard making sure when she came home she didn’t have to lift a finger. Laundry was done, dinner was cooked, a drink was placed in her hand when she walked in the house, I cleaned the dishes and kitchen. Ours is a partnership.
For the last several years I have worked from home remotely, making more $$$ than she does at her job, but dinner is still done every night when she walks in and a drink is there waiting on her after a hard day.
I open doors and even say “Yes mam and no mam” when talking to her. Not because I am less of a man, but because of respect for her.
I would die or kill for my wife without hesitation.
I am a firm believer marriage is a struggle that two people work EXTREMELY hard at every single day of their marriage.
The spark each of you felt in the days and early years of dating and marriage will eventually fade, and a marriage damn sure better have something else to fall back on.
I love her more and more every day, and always will.
The obvious biological differences aside, both women and men as individuals all have things they excel and struggle with. Each must learn for themselves what their limitations are, then hopefully thrive and not be a worthless drain on society, we have way too many of them already.
Males have a penis, testes, and can produce sperm, while Females have a vagina, ovaries, uterus, and can produce eggs. This is a basic principle of Biology.
Males have one X and one Y chromosome (XY), while Females have two X chromosomes (XX). This is a basic principle of Genetics.
Males have higher testosterone levels, while Females have higher levels of estrogen and progesterone. This is a basic principle of Endocrinology.
Males have a narrower, deeper, and more funnel-shaped pelvis to support a heavier body structure, while Females have a wider, shallower, and more circular pelvis to facilitate childbirth. This is a basic principle of Osteology.
Males often develop facial hair, a deeper voice, and more muscle mass during puberty, while Females often develop breasts, wider hips, and experience menstrual cycles. This is a basic principle of Physiology.
Sir/Mr./He/Him is used to address biological males, while Ma’am/Miss/Mrs./She/Her is used to address biological females. These are basic rules of etiquette and grammar.
A man can identify as a woman, dress like a woman, and live as a woman, but he cannot and will never experience womanhood. A woman can identify as a man, dress like a man, and live as a man, but she cannot and will never experience manhood.
Men are the head. Women are the heart.
Men provide. Women nurture.
They are equally distinct, yet equally needed for the harmony of society. They are oppositely unique, yet they perfectly complement each other.
Don't fall into delusions and misconceptions. You don't need to be religious to understand these concepts.